Do you adopt customs from your travels when you're back home?

I’ve kept the habit of blowing my nose in the sink and then washing my hands—a custom I picked up in India. Sometimes, non-travelers are shocked when they catch me in the act... 🤪

Also, when I run out of toilet paper, it doesn’t bother me—unless I’ve got company over... 🤪

Just got back from walking a friend’s dog (while they’re on vacation), wearing a djellaba and Tibetan boots... 😏😏😏 Oh, for sure, if I’d run into locals, I probably would’ve shocked them? 😏

Anyway, as long as I’m not spitting on the floor at a restaurant or squatting on the side of a highway with a water bottle in hand...

Do you bring back customs from your travels?

I brought back from France the habit of saying "excuse me" to people if I bump into them on the street. It sometimes surprises the locals. 🙂

At home, I brought back the "s'il vous plaît."

It surprises people or makes them smile. But it’s clear that it’s rare here to ask for something with the polite word that goes with it where we come from.

The other day, our baker asked my fiancé why we always said *Lütfen* ("please") when asking for bread. He told us that no one ever says that. We later noticed he was right. My fiancé then explained it was out of politeness. Every time we go for bread, we make them smile. It makes them happy. Plus, it’s always followed by a "thank you" and a "have a nice day."

For us, it goes without saying, and I’ll never drop those polite phrases.

Nil

It’s the same in China. I also make a point of using polite phrases all the time. Actually, no—I don’t force myself; it comes naturally. When you’ve used them your whole life, they just slip out, even if no one around you does the same.

What I don’t get—and what really annoys me—are Westerners who, after spending some time in China, pick up the habit and stop using polite phrases.

I mean, they brought customs back home... But as we know, some customs are frowned upon depending on the country.

They might get called out in their own country... just to respect their own customs.

Nil

It's funny how these polite phrases can sometimes feel out of place elsewhere... I also tend to say "thank you" when someone hands me something, no matter what—pen, lighter...

At one point, I was moving around a lot. In Thailand, after coming back from Japan, I’d often bow my head several times to say "oki oki" or... "thank you." How many times did I not join my hands in the Asian way to say thanks or sorry... Or after spending a long time in India, I can’t help but shake my head from side to side for just about anything... Or after more than a year in Egypt, I’d replace "all right" with "Yasalaam"😏

Also, when you get on a bus in Cairns, Australia, it’s not polite *not* to say hello to the bus driver. But in the Belgian capital, if you say hello to the bus driver, you might get mistaken for a flirt...

Yeah, same here—whether I'm speaking French or English, I always slip in Turkish expressions. It’s pretty funny when I’m on the phone with my parents and I let out an *öyle mi?*

Or an *Allah Allah* in a particular situation....

Hey Parvat 🙂

Long before I left for India, I’d sometimes eat with my fingers depending on the dish, and after going there, I’ve kept that habit wholeheartedly! 😉 It was in Ireland that I started drinking... Even though my region is near Belgium and we’re spoiled with Belgian beers here, I’d never really been tempted by them... Until I went to the Emerald Isle and happily drank a good cherry Kriek in the bars .

In Vietnam last October, there’s one gesture I’ve kept: turning your hand back and forth means "I don’t know" or "Yes and no" depending on the context...

When it comes to language, some words or expressions have now become part of my vocabulary, like "shanti shanti", "sláinte" ("cheers" in Irish Gaelic), and my favorite, which I can’t forget because it slips out unintentionally... "Excuse to me" from the Kashmiri guy I really hit it off with in Mamallapuram... At first, it was just a little joke, but looking back, when I remember our serious conversations and how rigorously he’d politely contradict me, Abbas would lightly touch my arm and say "excuse to me" to argue his point... If only I could’ve held back my laughter in those moments... My smile, on the other hand, was all over my face... Now, whenever I use his expression, I feel a lot of joyful nostalgia 🙂

Hey Nil,

I’ve been wondering a lot of things, like for example whether you learned to speak Turkish and if it was easy to pick up, how you handle shopping or asking locals for information, extract ext.... Seeing as I’ve been in İstanbul for 3 months now and I’m still struggling to learn a bit of the language—just through contact, no courses—and I can’t really understand what people say or respond to them except for a few words that are the same in Arabic. Anyway, I’ve got time to learn properly (another 6 months before heading back to Dubai) because I really need it—I want to do import-export between Turkey and Dubai since they’re the two big commercial hubs for textiles and electronics (Turkey for Europe and Dubai for Arab countries). These two economic powerhouses are now booming in financing.

😄,

In France, I sometimes come off as a bit odd when I say "Bonjour" when entering a shop and "Au revoir" when leaving. It’s a custom I picked up from my childhood country, one that seems to have fallen out of fashion here, but I still hold onto it 🙂

Everything evolves, everything changes. I also say hello when entering shops, and if no one answers, I repeat it a little louder, and then, well, a few people respond, a bit embarrassed... It's pretty systematic. I spent a few years in Ghana, and the indifference of people here weighs on me... Actually, they’ve forgotten how to communicate, and that’s why we easily adopt other customs if they’re friendly... (I’m not talking about the ones Parvat adopted ;-))))))

As you know, I’ve kept the cuisine from my trips to Southeast Asia as the main food at home. From India, we (just between us, of course) use the head-nodding agreement—it still makes us laugh.

Hi Afif,

We had an intensive 2-month course, three evenings a week. 9 hours per week. It was just the basic rules. But it helped us understand the concept of sentence structure and verbs.

Learning the language was really tough. The advantage with vocabulary is that there are a lot of French words. And since we had no choice but to communicate, we picked it up quickly. The help from our amazing neighbors played a huge part in my ability to express myself. Since they only speak Turkish and we spend a lot of time with them, we learn a lot.

But I’ll admit that going grocery shopping wasn’t easy and was often frustrating. Not being able to express what you’re looking for. You really shouldn’t be afraid of looking silly—using gestures, acting out what you want... looking like an idiot. But it works, it makes people smile, and they’re usually nice and try to understand you.

Now, it’s much easier. I can express myself and clearly explain a problem or what I want. Of course, sometimes I have to say my Turkish is "Tarzan-level" when people don’t realize and start talking a mile a minute. Either they slow down, keep going at the same pace, or just speak louder...

I don’t understand the language well—I’m not deaf!!!! 🤪

But now, I can follow a conversation. I can tell jokes in Turkish, watch TV and understand what’s going on (the big picture). I also learn by listening to Turkish music. I find the lyrics online and read along. And when I don’t understand something, I use a dictionary—it’s our best friend, after all.

Life is so much simpler now.

Another thing I brought back with me—and my students are "contaminated" by it, lol—is my way of answering questions. Like, "Ben non!" (Well, no!), "Ben oui!" (Well, yes!), and when something is done: "Voilà!"

Now my students say those too, with a thick accent that’s hilarious. They always ask for more about French. Turks loooove the language. For them, French is synonymous with culture and education—thanks to Atatürk, who adored everything French.

So now, "ben oui," "ben non," "voilà," and "Monsieur," "Madame" are flying around the school... 😄

Nil

Another thing we’ve adopted from here is responding negatively with a tongue click.

When my fiancé arrived here, a month after me, I’d already picked that up. It drove him crazy!!!!!! Because where we’re from, it’s really, really not polite.

And now, he does it too! 😄

And another thing I do that’s really not polite... when I’m on the phone with my parents or friends and I don’t want them to understand, I speak Turkish. It infuriates my mom....😎 But it’s so funny....

Okay, I know it’s not polite at all, but sometimes it’s just so practical....

On the other hand, something that drives me nuts is that after speaking Turkish and English every day, I’ve started making horrible mistakes in French..... And I used to be so good at it....

So please forgive me, Lütfen!

Görüşürüz,

Nil à la Turka!

... in Tahiti and French Polynesia, raising your eyebrows with a slight emphasis when you pass someone on the street means "hello"...

... the same gesture in private or in a meeting means "yes" or "I agree"...

... along with the famous expression "fiu" and the occasional use of the pareo, it’s the only custom I’ve kept...

... and I’ve also long practiced nose-blowing with my fingers—much more effective: highly recommend to all you klutzes! !

The most glaring ones: the Inshallah!! Oh well, nothing to be done, it’s hopeless I’ll always keep it. The head nod I picked up in India. Sometimes it makes me look like a crazy person, along with the "Atchaaaa!!" (= more or less "oh really?" or "okay") that also slips out all the time (way more awkward than the Inshallah since no one seems to understand what I just did: talk, sneeze, mumble... 🤪)

But also: eating with my hands whenever I can, saying no the Malagasy way (meaning without saying a word, just making a nasal sound with a specific intonation—hard to explain, but those who’ve been there get it), oh yeah, and with a friend, we communicate in French but using the Hindi alphabet (we even improved it by inventing new signs for French sounds). It’s become our code. It’s completely useless except for making us laugh and bringing a little magic and India into our correspondence. 😄

Hi there! 😎

Aaah Piaf, your cooking... it makes my mouth water hehehe... Yes, yes, I had the pleasure of tasting a few little dishes, yum. When are you coming to say hi? 😉

Ren, a cherry kriek—kriek means cherry... 😉 I don’t remember the hand-turning thing in Vietnam...

I heard that in some parts of Africa, people file their teeth into points??? Has anyone ever been tempted?😏

The thing I can’t help but laugh at is in India when someone asks me, "What is your good name?" I love it.

Saying no to the *magache*—I’m curious... *Bokra incha'Allah*...

😉 Now here's a post that deserves everyone's attention—you should never forget politeness. And it's the same on the phone—lots of people forget their manners. Thanks for reminding us! 😏😏😏

Me too with the "inch'allah"! But also chorizo all the time, eating with my fingers, a more relaxed driving style, speed bumps are still called "topes," and the food. I’m sure I’m forgetting stuff, but that’s what comes to mind right now.

Napping! If my schedule allows it, of course 😉

What a lovely topic, Parvat!

I used to—and still do—say "excuse me" when passing in front of someone in a supermarket aisle. But lately, I’ve realized that the classic Australian "that's ok" or "you're right" ("no problem") is replaced in France by bovine silence. I mean, we’re not exactly used to someone apologizing for reaching past us to grab the soap on the shelf either. So when politeness meets politeness, it’s almost an event! You almost feel like swapping good tips on the spot!

That little wave when passing another car on the road... only happens in the outback. In more populated areas, or around tourist-heavy Alice Springs, people look at you like you’re an alien if you wave... So in France, 😄😄😄 I didn’t keep up that habit! Uh... except in the countryside, where a little "bonjour" is still appreciated, even if half the time you don’t get a response. Statistically, it’s still better than in supermarket aisles! (Those places depress me!)

Back in '98 during my trip to Peru, I brought back a ritual that Peruvians use every time they cross a mountain pass. They pick up a stone, place it on a pile of rocks that isn’t a cairn, and pour a little water on the ground. It’s a belief to thank Mother Earth for keeping them safe so far—Pacha Mama.

I’ve been doing the same thing everywhere I go since then 🙂

- From my many trips, I’ve kept: the wrist flick from left to right (pretty universal!!!) that means: "what do you want, what are we doing?" sleeping in a sleeping bag on the couch or in the garden under the stars (in summer) even though I have a bedroom and a bed!! expressions like: ya allah, fucking asshole, yok, la. the habit of taking my bike instead of the car for short trips. using "tu" instead of "vous"!!!! or the big culture shock in France!!! (I have to say, it’s really hard for me to control, and I even end up using "tu" with people in job interviews!!! Not good!!!). Otherwise, I also say "bonjour" and "au revoir" in shops!! I don’t feel like that’s a lost habit! !

I kept the habit of blowing my nose in the sink and then washing my hands—a custom I picked up in India. Sometimes, non-travelers are shocked when they catch me in the act... Also, when I run out of toilet paper, it doesn’t bother me—unless I have visitors... 🤪

Well, I didn’t know I was copying an Indian custom too! Welcome to the club of those who forget to buy tissues 😏

From India, I brought back their head nod... When something doesn’t quite sit right with me, I shake my head like a "plastic dog in the back window of an R18." I don’t know how to describe how they do it, but I love it too!

I also say "hello, goodbye, please ma'am" in shops... but that seems like the least I can do in terms of manners!

Otherwise, I have tons of spices—garam masala, ras el hanout, turmeric—well, I put them everywhere and kind of randomly instead of plain salt... Mmm, and real harissa with the grains! Eating with chopsticks, what a delicacy!

I always say "Yamas" for cheers, and I use "tt" (short for *tout*) all the time—I picked up the expression in the south of France, but it doesn’t exist here!!!

🙂 Good evening,

I’m a huge fan of Morocco, and I have to admit that when I return to France, I keep the magic alive. I’m pretty good at cooking various tagines, and spices are almost part of my daily life. As for decor, I have my "Moroccan living room" from Richbond because it was too complicated to bring it back from there. And when it comes to outfits, at home it’s all "made in Morocco"—beauty products like argan soap and oil, rose cream. I’ll stop because the list is long... Oh! I don’t wear a veil, and I still don’t walk behind my husband. On the other hand, we’ve decided that in 3 or 4 years, we’ll settle down there to live among Moroccans and the Moroccan way. Inshallah!

Malian tea. It's drunk in three rounds. It lasts at least an hour. Two sips per person and lots of chatting.

for me, it’s not really a custom, but in Israel, Iran, etc., people play shesh besh all the time. when I was in Israel, I learned it and fell in love with it—I played it constantly. I still play it often, especially with my Persian/Iranian friends, and I’ve taught a few people in my neighborhood too.

I also keep phrases... I studied in Helsinki one summer with a friend from my university, and when we got back to California, we’d randomly say things like, "joo" (yeah), "liisa lyolya!" (a sauna phrase), "makkara!" (sausage). We missed Helsinki. From Israel, I keep phrases like, "shtock yamaniac!" (shut up), "matomeret!!" (what are you saying?!), "mayniyanim" (how’s it going?).

In Taiwan, I learned how to haggle. It’s a super useful skill.

Hi there, I’m surprised by what you’re saying because for me, this is just part of my upbringing—I didn’t need to bring it back from any trips. I think it’s really important and a sign of respect toward others. Here in Belgium, that’s how people recognize us—we always say "please" when we give something...

Otherwise, what I’ve brought back from my travels are more like culinary specialties or drinks...

Have a good evening, Sonia

Of course, I didn’t bring these polite phrases back in my suitcases. I just wanted to compare the warm relationships you find in Africa (for example...) with the indifference that often prevails here. That said, I realize I wasn’t actually answering the question that was asked 🙁

hi, re-reading my response, I realize it came off a bit aggressive when that wasn’t the intention—so sorry, and I also spotted a few mistakes, sorry again 😊 have a great day sonia

🙂 No problem!!

Little language quirks, words—things that make my daily speech an increasingly eclectic mix.

From Germany, I picked up punctuality and respect for speed limits. It made me smile the last time I was in France; I was starting to develop different driving reflexes, even waiting for the little pedestrian signal to turn green before crossing! 😇

From Morocco, expressions, especially "Salam Aleikoum," which has become such a reflex that I sometimes catch myself just in time when entering a shop (and trust me, you say "hello" even less in a German shop than in France!!)

Clothing habits too—I even adapted a couple of djellabas into a "European" style so I could wear them as coats on the street. From the cuisine, tons of spices I bring back every time... it’s "professional" since I teach Moroccan cooking classes and sell saffron :lol: but I enjoy them for myself first! Especially saffron tea :)

From Belgium, at one point, I brought back the accent, but I’ve lost it since.

Yesterday, I got a notice from Hydro-Québec explaining why that HUGE generator was installed on my street—an important cable had been accidentally cut. There might be frequent power outages... but "normal" should be back soon.

First outage... I’m enjoying the summer heat, Italy just beat Ukraine, and my neighborhood is buzzing (I literally live two steps from Little Italy in Montreal). My neighbors are grumbling and cursing the blackout... Me? I’m thinking like I did in Santo Domingo: No problem! *La vida es buena!* and *¡Qué calor!* 😛

Maybe I’ll start grumbling too... especially at the next outage when it’s -40! 😛

From my life in the forests when I was younger, or from my stays/hikes in nature (mountains, forests, ocean, etc.), in France and mostly around Europe, I’ve kept the habit of sitting cross-legged "Indian-style" (not from India) very often—at least once a day, sometimes more—because "Western" chairs never felt natural to me. When I was in high school or university, they used to "break my back." So now, whenever I can, I sit on the grass, sand, or the floor, cross-legged or in half-lotus (which also comes from meditation).

In the end, I like sitting on chairs or similar things less and less. The same goes for sleeping—I prefer lying on the grass, the floor, a futon, or something like that. I find it more natural.

From Japan, for example, I’ve kept a few kimonos, some basic expressions, and I also often sit *seiza* (on my knees, for the same reasons, haha). I’d already used kimonos and *seiza* a bit when I practiced martial arts in France, but apart from the top of a *judogi*, I can’t see myself wearing one everywhere… lol. Some people probably already think I’m a bit weird—I don’t want to provoke them even more by wearing a kimono, a sword, etc. ;)

If I go somewhere else one of these days, it’d probably be Polynesia or Asia (but more likely the Southeast, less "urban" than Japan). After that, I don’t know all the other traditions or habits—I just take the ones I like.

Hey! For my part, I’ve definitely kept the hands-together gesture like in Southeast Asia to say thanks or apologize—but not all the time, it just comes out naturally when I’m really expressing deep feeling... Blowing my nose into my hands at the sink or while hiking... After coming back from South America, I drank *tons* of mate and, above all, I always wore my Bolivian hat outside. People thought it was hilarious, but I love my hat... That’s about it, I think, apart from that it’s not really culture anymore—just a few expressions here and there and some word-order issues in French copied from English, like "definitely," "to be honest," "I’m sorry" every other second... but hey, that’s just linguistics!

Hey,

It's crazy how our minds and bodies can absorb influences from others. At home, the traditions we keep are all about spices—we eat a lot of Asian, Indian, African food... I notice it when my kids invite friends over, and they look at their plates with skepticism 😕. We have a hammock and a little mattress for the baby’s bed, plus a ton of cushions in the living room so we can be close to the floor—to eat, watch TV, have drinks, take a nap, or meditate. The only ones who use the couch are guests and grandparents. Mint tea is still a staple. Pitching a tent in the mountains and sleeping under the stars is another one. And don’t even get me started on clothes—they think we’re total weirdos, especially now with our African-inspired outfits (it’s hot out). When we’re out shopping and my kids see people who aren’t smiling all the time (unlike their parents’ goofy faces), they say, "Hey, he’s not happy—why’s that lady looking grumpy?" Sometimes we even get *the look* in return! But at 4 years old, they just say it like it is, and honestly, they’re not wrong. I also think saying hello is becoming a lost art. We live near the French-Swiss border, and we’ve picked up some habits there... Now when we go back south to visit family, we find people rushed, disrespectful (like ignoring crosswalks), and the place just feels dirtier. Before, it never bothered us...

The worst part, I think, is the pace—I’m completely incapable of rushing or running to be on time. Everyone thinks I’m *way* too laid-back, even the Swiss (and that’s saying something). But at least I’m not stressing myself into an ulcer, and honestly, it’s so much more relaxing. 😏

I brought back the thumbs-up from Brazil to say hello, thanks, it's all good. It's super handy...it avoids a lot of talking.

😉 Hi there!

I’m also a French teacher in Turkey, and I really relate to what you’re saying. I think you’re right—there are moments when we’re thrown off by everyday situations (things we’d consider "impolite"), and your bakery example is so spot-on! It’s happened to me a million times, too!!! Using "lütfen" the way I’d use "s’il vous plaît" in my native language... and it’s often not quite right. Their polite phrases can be so hard to memorize—actually, I don’t even know the exact one: "alabiyi miyim?" 🤪 (when asking for water or something at a restaurant).

I’d love to ask you some questions about the differences between Canadian and Turkish culture, since it interests me and I’m writing my Master’s thesis on French-Turkish interculturality. 😎 Looking forward to reading you! !

Oh yes, the Indian head wobble! I love it!!😛 And "chello!" when there's a car stuck in front of me or too much of a crowd! And a little Tibetan expression that’s too cute: "djo!" = let’s go!

Did you pick that up in Africa, Choucarde? Or just from the south of France? ;););)

Naptime! If my schedule gives me the time, of course ;)

From the Middle East, we kept the habit of smoking shisha during family meals or with friends😉 Of speaking Arabic among ourselves 😛 when we share secrets😉, of eating Lebanese food. From Africa, we brought back expressions that aren’t used in France.

Thinking about it (thanks Parvat😉), we brought back different languages that we mix depending on the situation😏 and we left our hearts in every country.😊

No more Africa for now—I’m exhausted, plus it’s raining....😉😉😎

From several Middle Eastern and Asian countries: the great habit of taking off my shoes when I get home (I’ve mentioned this elsewhere—shoes and the unconscious way Westerners behave with their feet around others is, to me, a nasty habit).

From India and Thailand: a bit more dental hygiene. The good habit of brushing my teeth after every meal (India) or using a toothpick (Thailand).

I’m generally shocked by how unclean Westerners are: clothes not washed often, hair that smells bad—you wonder how many people go days and days without washing!

From India and Thailand: a bit more dental hygiene. The good habit of brushing my teeth after every meal (India), or using a toothpick (Thailand).

Oh, so you waited until you went to Asia to brush your teeth 😎😎

No, Georges, it's just humor

Oh no, Lea! But I’ve reinforced my good habits after my travels. I see around me: almost none of my colleagues (from multiple nationalities) brush their teeth after lunch.

Georges 😉

For years, we’ve had foldable toothbrushes in pharmacies for people coming back from the canteen... or restaurants.

Otherwise, among the habits I’ve brought back from abroad: Spanish schedules! Oh no, lunch at seven in the evening is over for me!

The "no pasa nada!" mindset—an essential filter.

Spanish humor isn’t always well received here, but hey... it’s my way of refusing to conform to gloominess and overdone propriety.

Léa.

Another habit (though not travel-related) when it comes to hygiene is washing the other end of the digestive tract. Sometimes, it takes some effort to maintain that minimum level of hygiene. Luckily, I’m a naturist—it helps! 😄

Oh yeah, but don’t tell me about it! 😎

I brought back the habit of lining up and waiting my turn, and no longer going home the same way I did in Angola. Sometimes it does some good.

🙂 That's kind of you! 😉