Inside South Africa
FR

Translated into English.

MA Max68 Globetrotter ·
I’d say it’s more like Mrs Gray 😉
VO Voyajou Globetrotter ·
Yes, it's beautiful, and so much more than that. There are a few professional photographers here whose shots really do the place justice, including Louis Botha, who let me pull out my phone to show you some of them.
VO Voyajou Globetrotter ·
Hi Muriel, Going by your scant clues, Captain Benny Griesel is at least sure your book isn’t about his latest case, Kobra, which takes place between Cape Town and Stellenbosch. Deon Meyer is from here and often rides the Karoo trails by bike with a group of buddies.
VO Voyajou Globetrotter ·
even though the constraints of a sedentary life make me dream less than the discoveries of a nomad 😉

Same for me. But don’t get me wrong—sedentary life can be an adventure too. For example, if you love mobile safaris, imagine that in a *safar’immobile* (immobile safari), you discover that the wood screws have a reverse thread and you have to engage the drill in reverse for them to go in. 🤪
MA Max68 Globetrotter ·
wood screws are reversed and you have to engage the drill in reverse for them to go in

Oh yeah! That’s tricky! 😇 😏

I’m currently reading a novel set in your "neck of the woods" 😉 *The Scent of Apples* by Mark Behr...
RJ Rjulie95 Globetrotter ·
Be sure to thank him for me! I just discovered his really beautiful work :)
VO Voyajou Globetrotter ·
To Die for... Hell Ah... have I already taken you to Die Hel? Inevitably, when you keep haunting the same places, you end up repeating yourself. The road is poorly paved but without any particular intention. This morning, apart from a few other baboons, I’m alone in Hell (where are the others, Jean-Paul?). A voluptuous goddess, descendant of the pioneers who settled here, prepares me a devilish breakfast with products from her garden, including fig, apricot, peach, and even orange jams. An Eden, with snakes but no apple. Despite the persistent drought, the Gamka River flows through the middle, siphoning what’s left of the upstream lake. In the courtyard of the old Snyman house, I startle a herd of kudus that take off in panicked strides. * Foul moon (I’ve already taken you to the Moon, but this time it’s the Moon that insists and repeats itself.) What’s it up to now? It’s boring us—what a thrill! Those from the city head into the desert, to a high spot to get as close as possible to the celestial body. What dizziness! Everyone brings food and drink. It’s the moon bar, and we’re invited. Until the end, I hope for a cancellation: the Moon, tangled in its lunar calendar, might have other plans—a eclipse, a big bang, a storm drawing a heavy curtain of clouds, or a detour to Mars for a change. The alignment of the stars works in my favor: an hour before departure, a bakkie carrying a fiery redhead in its bed—could this be a sacrificial evening?—brings the good news: the Celestial Body is privatized. The rendezvous will take place in the gardens of a yoga school competing with the one attended by the woman who put me in orbit. The prospect of this one-on-one perks me up. It’s her day of glory. Boldly, she rises in broad daylight above an isolated peak, and from my seat, I see a cup-and-ball game. In the distance, on a track in the relief, a car’s headlights wink at her, unless they’re communicating in Morse. The Moon is now also in full beam—hey, we’ve seen you, switch to low beam! Miroslav Vitous jams Universal Syncopations. I whistle a *Down to Earth* and puff on a Havana. …/... The next day, night falls without her. The star will make us wait over an hour before setting the horizon ablaze, appearing all at once in less than a minute, red but off-center from the cup-and-ball—the show is over. She rises behind racing clouds that give her Saturn’s rings. * Love in the meadows I don’t fantasize about Herefords, nor speculate on Merino wool prices, and I’m not planning to buy the latest John Deere either. If I sometimes read the Farmer’s Weekly, it’s simply to understand—or even embrace—the concerns of those who occupy the land. The most amusing serious section is the personal ads. Here are the most common expectations in women’s requests: Christian, in good health, financially independent, non-drinker, non-smoker, and pet lover. Excerpt: « I’m looking for a (white) man, friendly, understanding, generous, loving, creative, and honest. He must love cats and enjoy browsing flea markets and thrift stores. He must be in good health, circumcised, own a car, and be hardworking... » If at this stage you’ve checked all the boxes and are still interested, the list of the applicant’s qualities follows. Signed « Creative Lady », and I sense the widow who’s just finished her third... * Bill the smoker Not the Clinton who just got smoked like a cigar (normal for a guy who doesn’t know how to properly use one—probably collateral damage from the embargo on Cuba). No, Bill the garage inventor who smoked out the entire planet with his oversold software before stepping back from the controls—but not the dividends—and now sets out to improve the world’s fate (a Googlesque habit), with a favorite playground: Africa, and a benevolent target: the underprivileged. In Africa, cigarette packs don’t reach the delirium tremens level of those sold in Europe or Australia, but they do start warning of the danger: smokers are fools that Bill has decided to save. One of the octopus’s tentacles helps African states fight the tobacco industry, as if Philip Morris had helped us fight Microsoft’s abuses (soft, really?). Once deprived of alcohol and cigarettes, what will the poor have left... religion and Microsoft in a burger? We’re not SchTrumpfs! At an evening with a half-resistance, half-conspiracy vibe, Reinie, aka ‘the Princess,’ uses an amber cigarette holder and, laughing bitterly, says we belong to an endangered species, doubly so. (Written with OpenOffice, the free software). * Adventure right at home The track is fast at first but slowed by gates that must be opened and closed, a sign you’re moving from one farm to another. Farms whose inhabitants you won’t see. Then it narrows as it becomes less maintained and tackles the relief. Then, only two tracks remain in the rocky terrain, and when they’re suddenly cut off by erosion, passersby add stones to the work. I plan to approach a reservoir lake from behind to measure its emptiness. From this reservoir, already at its lowest at the start of the year, I only see a puddle in the distance against the dam. The rock that once held the water bears its scars fifteen meters up, and the bottom is covered in shrubby vegetation where baboons bark and ostriches—birds that can neither fly nor swim—stride. Out of reflex, or habit, I collect driftwood that I would have made into a fire and that will become a lamp. To get out of there somewhere other than my entry point, I try unknown tracks. I break my back in ravines that springboks and kudus laugh at, before running into locked gates: I’m a prisoner of the Swartberg Nature Reserve. I’ll have to resign myself to going back the way I came. But for Christmas, I’m ordering a helicopter. *
RJ Rjulie95 Globetrotter ·
Will you share the name of the guest house where you stayed near Hell?

For the moon, you were luckier than me—it stayed hidden in the Parisian gloom. 🏴‍☠️
VO Voyajou Globetrotter ·
Victoria's Secret I headed north toward the Kalahari through the Northern Cape. This province is both the largest (two-thirds the size of France), the least populated (just over a million inhabitants), and the poorest in South Africa. I arrived in Victoria West in the late afternoon, determined to stop there. Well, that’s done: the main street is blocked by a demonstration. It’s the ceremony honoring, at the end of each school year, the high school students who successfully completed their secondary studies.

Fifty-seven couples will be dropped off by chauffeur-driven cars on a red carpet before climbing the steps of the Town Hall.

The principal and his deputy are getting impatient.



Here they come!

















Me too, when I grow up...
MA Magryelle Regular ·
Thanks for these beautiful photos. In our chilly France, I can feel the vibe from here. You must’ve had a really great time!
MA Max68 Globetrotter ·
You'd think you were attending weddings 😉
VO Voyajou Globetrotter ·
Two providers for a night in Hell: - the family established in the middle of the valley who runs the restaurant, a campsite, and a few houses - Cape Nature, which offers a campsite at the start of the valley and renovated historic accommodations at the other end. In any case, Cape Nature’s accommodations are more pleasant.
VO Voyajou Globetrotter ·
Haute couture To leave the comfort and safety of the oasis, you’ve got to shake up your body, but you can’t let your mind dry up. And to nourish it, nothing beats the road. So I plant the willing gardener and tear off for a getaway north to the Central Kalahari, if the beast cooperates and if the temperature forecasts above 40°C are revised downward. For the occasion, I’m wearing long shorts over socks and boots: in the high veld, I’ll be incognito.

After a few hours, I reach the Great Escarpment, which leads to the Upper Karoo plateau with a modest elevation gain of seven hundred meters—enough to create two different agricultural regions. In winter, the herds stay at the foot of the escarpment, moving up for summer grazing. Even today, this transhumance is done on foot, and I’ll cross or overtake three columns of over a thousand head each. Unfortunately, no chance to chat about fabrics with the ragged shepherds who only understand Afrikaans.

I’ve set out to take these west-to-east tracks, climbing one, descending the next—one stitch right-side out, one wrong-side out. It’s a disjointed journey. I’m holding the thread, but sometimes I have to go around a needle, other times slip through an eye. What the shepherds cover in three or four days takes me only a few hours, but I’ve been doing this for three years straight. This year, the already-sheared sheep are moving earlier than usual: there’s no water left in the Lower Karoo’s reservoirs and barely anything left to graze on. On the plateau, the natural depressions are dry, but the man-made reservoirs still hold water, and the vegetation is more bronze than brown.







* Seen on TV Jesus Superstar. Several thousand people, all dressed in their Sunday best, are gathered in a hall to listen to the preacher’s sermon. In this case, it’s a preacher—a blunt, Black woman with the voice of Janis Joplin in Summertime and the cadence of Patti Smith in the prelude to Horses. A drummer and two guitarists accompany her, underscoring her words with chords and rolls. Dozens of believers lie on the floor, writhing or frozen, somewhere between an epileptic fit and a hypnotic trance. The sermon’s intensity doesn’t let up, and the collapsed are carried off, or those struggling are dragged away, to pile up those who’ve lost it. (1) Whatever Pascal (Blaise, the inventor of the precautionary principle) might bet, it’s understood these questions appeal more to the spirit than to reason—but not to the point of losing it entirely! I don’t buy it. The sermons are interspersed with ads for the usual church-branded gadgets (stickers, magnets, pens, T-shirts, caps...). At the bottom of the screen, 24/7 prayer lines scroll by. Is this reality TV or infomercial? I was watching Tswane TV, which operates part-time. Faith, the full-time rival channel, is barely less intense. Cioran comes to mind: *‘Without the vigilance of irony, how easy it would be to found a religion! All it would take is letting the onlookers gather around our loquacious trances.’*

(1) Between rival churches, miracles are weapons. Last year, a preacher asked a woman to lie down on the stage—the altar?—and had a 250-pound speaker placed on her, assuring her he’d handle the miracle and she wouldn’t feel a thing. Indeed, she didn’t flinch: her ribcage caved in, and she died at the hospital. The apprentice sorcerer had confused *heavy* with *Lourdes*. * "Crunch crunch crunch" That’s how the tow truck driver describes the noise the Defender is making to his mechanic buddy over the phone. He’s holding the phone with one hand, scratching himself with the other, and steering with his knees—reassuring to feel rescued. The night before, alerted by jerky movements, I barely made it to a roadside campsite. When I tried to maneuver, I couldn’t engage any gear. I tried all 28 possible combinations, but the car just crunched (*crunch crunch crunch*) and didn’t budge an inch.

At the garage of a Land Rover enthusiast and specialist—yes, they exist—the boss confirms the issue in ten seconds (a worn gear between the gearbox and transfer case) and announces with a big smile that he has the part in stock. It’s one of the beast’s Achilles’ heels—which seems to have more than four. * Serves him right! I’m driving over 80 km/h on a gravel track in the Karoo Highlands. With this oversteering donkey I call a ride, that speed already demands full attention. A cloud of dust approaches from behind, too fast to be a dust devil—so it’s a devil of a man. He must be doing 120 km/h, so to let him pass, I ease off the gas and pull as far left as possible. The custom is to slow down during overtaking to avoid stone chips, then thank the other driver by flashing your hazards, to which they respond with a headlight flash. But he does neither, gripping the wheel like his life depends on it. I just catch a glimpse of sheep and their shepherd in the back of a pickup, the former getting their wool ruffled and the latter, clinging to the sides, swallowing dust without complaint. Not sure the sheep are in that much of a hurry! I’ll see them again at the Fraseburg slaughterhouse and have a word with the driver about the rock that chipped my windshield. The dust cloud pulls ahead, leaves me in the dust, then stops. A few minutes later, I catch up. The jack’s already out: all that’s left of the rear right tire is shreds. It must’ve taken nerves of steel and experience to keep the sheep from becoming casualties. I check if he needs help, without mentioning the windshield chip. Each day has enough trouble of its own. * Depending on who you are... Arriving from the heights, you’d think it’s an Italian town: all you see is a forest of yews. But once in Murraysburg, the illusion fades—I’m definitely in an African town. On the sidewalks, cows and donkeys prune the trees, while goats take care of the trash. The yews shade the wealthy’s well-kept cemetery. In the adjacent poor cemetery, a dense forest of stone mounds and wooden crosses rises. No trees, no plants: the goats handle the upkeep. A few newly rich have bled themselves dry for veined marble. * Communalism Communalism to protect oneself from the other was apartheid’s doctrine. Twenty years later, people still largely live among their own, but it’s true elsewhere too—it might even be a growing trend. The Oranians built a town on a 3,000-hectare private property. Two main criteria for admission: being Afrikaner and not employing any workers or domestic help—implied, non-white—meaning you do everything yourself. You’ll see whites pushing lawnmowers or wheelbarrows, wielding hammers and pickaxes, or driving tractors. For barely over a thousand inhabitants, the town has five or six different places of worship, all Protestant. The language used is Afrikaans, exclusively, and the country’s old flag flies over the town. In fact, I didn’t see any mixed-race people, let alone Black ones. Only whites, and not particularly refined ones. Maybe they should consider mixing things up? * My night with the sisters Located in the Great Karoo, the farm is vast enough to contain the Three Sisters—three flat-topped mountains that could just as well be brothers. Nicolette insists that after Table Mountain, the Three Sisters are the country’s most iconic. Yeah, right! The family’s been here since 1830, when the ancestor, en route to the Diamond Rush, was left for dead. Nursed back to health by a passing Hottentot, he continued to Kimberley, where he quickly found two diamonds valuable enough to buy the farm. The current generation running Three Sisters Farm is down to three sisters who find the coincidence amusing. They manage 14,000 contiguous hectares where sheep and goats roam, along with a few horses and five different antelope species. Baboons and elusive leopards are also at home. Precipitation and temperatures have been recorded in large brown notebooks since 1911, and Michelle confirms this is the worst drought in a century. The current farmhouse—abandoned in the late 19th century after the wells dried up—is nestled in a valley where water still flows abundantly. Tortoises and porcupines have come down from the mountain to vacation in the park, waiting for better days.

If I dared, I’d suggest that resting on the past and under their braided crowns won’t secure the future, that the rooms could use an upgrade, and that repairs to the workers’ housing wouldn’t be a luxury. But too many signs point to a lack of means.

At dusk, the sisters’ father settles on the terrace with his daily brandy and invites me to join him. Often, he raises his eyebrows: he’s not entirely convinced by female management.

Later, under a waxing moon and against my better judgment, I witness a marital spat between Michelle and her husband. On one hand, she wears the pants; on the other, they seem unaccustomed to having guests.

As I’m about to retire, a man in his forties approaches me. He’d been dining with the owners, childhood friends. He’s been living in exile in Australia for twelve years, holds a good job in Adelaide, is married to an Australian with two daughters—but every year, he has to come back here, alone. Why? His answer, sad and laconic, like an obvious truth: *‘Because this is my country.’*

At dawn, we learn a beer truck broke into the farm. Coming down from the mountain, it forgot to stop at the intersection, plowed straight through two fence lines, used the raised railway as a ramp, lost half its cargo on landing, and rolled into the veld.

When we arrive, about fifteen pickups have already driven through the breach, and looters are loading their beds with packs and pallets. The locals know they’ll be left with the plastic and shattered glass to clean up to prevent fires. *

…/...

I don’t know if swallows’ brains are divided into two hemispheres, but they’d never think of changing now. Me? I would.
MA Max68 Globetrotter ·
Hello there, African friend 🙂,

Is it just me, or does Jolly Jumper do everything he can to keep you from getting bored during your getaways? 😉

I don’t know if swallows’ brains are divided into two hemispheres, but they’d never think of changing now. Me? I would.

Compared to where you’re from or where you are now? 😛

Thanks for these beautiful images 🙂 🙂 🙂

Still, one day you’ll have to let me discover one or another of your far-flung paradises 😎
VO Voyajou Globetrotter ·
« Welcome to South Africa »

That’s what the banners at Cape Town Airport proclaim. If you head into the city, you won’t see much—or anything at all—but if you take the N2 east, after a few kilometers, a sign warns: “Dangerous area, do not stop.” The highway cuts through one of the country’s largest townships, Khayelitsha. The protective walls—who are they protecting, and from whom?—made of cement, lie in ruins, and you’d have to believe a stalled car would soon resemble a cornfield after a locust swarm. A security van transporting cash, broken down on the first exit ramp after the zone, follows the rule. Six armed men stand guard while waiting for the tow truck. The warning proved justified the following night: two local thugs murdered an entire family in their tin shack for three mobile phones and a few DVDs—hopefully educational ones. They had raped first. Along an axis perpendicular to the highway, planes take off and land, flying low over the township, and the residents don’t seem to have rocket launchers. Crucified like this, maybe they should put up a sign: “Silence, we kill”? For good measure, that same week, a farming family was massacred on their land. At night, they were white. They had been tortured first. For twenty years, it’s been a long litany. Doesn’t an extremist (or is he?) political leader say, “One bullet, one white”? Yet last year, South Africa’s tourism numbers were up by 13%. *

Fire (to)

He’s no warmonger, and he certainly didn’t set the mountain ablaze after months without rain—like him. We had to make the tough call to *fire* Jan, meaning send him back home. It was him or the plants. Without him, they have a chance, and without them, he’ll survive. What comes next is even sadder: Jan won’t be replaced by a colleague but by a machine, an automated irrigation system. A sophisticated setup that will cater to each plant or tree’s needs, delivering just the right amount of water and significantly cutting consumption. That’s the way of the times—balancing social conscience and ecological responsibility. Or the other way around. *

The Cow or the Milk?

At the speed of light, the house is less than a millisecond from the plateau where the continent’s most powerful telescope stands. The chaos of the stars proves there was no plan. Or maybe God is an English gardener. Shooting stars take the shuttle to oblivion. The horizon flashes with silent storms we’ll never see. And no one answers this question: what happened to the cow that started the Milky Way? And the bucket? And the stool? And the farmer? Were they turned into constellations? *

The Tube

From clear dawn till dusk, they dig, an army of moles armed with shovels. The plan is as complex as the subway’s. They toil and mark out stations. Soon, they’ll bury blue tubes and black pipes. Water will flow under electronic control. Fearing a Trafalgar moment or another *Water-gate* in this *pipe* problem, I’m putting it to you. The setup includes 600 meters of piping: 200 meters with an inner diameter of 25mm, 300 meters at 20mm, and the rest at 15mm. The pump delivers 4,000 liters per hour, but due to the drought, the flow steadily declines until it stabilizes at 2,000 liters after an hour of use. The drip system only works when the entire circuit is under pressure. How long will it take to fill the system? And knowing each mini-valve delivers 2.2L/h at 1 bar of pressure, how many can I install at most? *

The Water War

So, despite recent immigration from Brittany, the Karoo is suffering its worst drought in a century. The culprit is a child prodigy, El Niño—an outsider, no less! With aquifers drained, people dig deeper and deeper wells, siphoning their neighbors’ reserves. One day soon, they’ll bring up fire. *

Diversity

Two hundred people tonight at the Bush Pub, the local weekend institution. A resident couple is celebrating their wedding anniversary for two days and two nights. The guests are South African, Namibian, and European—Black, white, and mixed-race; young, overweight, slim, or old. Long, tight dresses, short shorts on baobab thighs, John Deere caps. Among elegant, overexcited forty-somethings bouncing off the walls, a few local Afrikaner faces serve up sour expressions. The guitarist-singer, heavily backed by electronics, plays dated standards in his own image. Buff but soft-hearted, he somberly croons Black is black. I don’t remember the night. At home, a strange stereo reaches me: township percussion in my left ear, white bass in my right. I’ve spotted a 3,000-hectare farm, the nearest neighbor ten kilometers away. For the housewarming, I’ll listen to The Sound of Silence. And if Simon & Garfunkel aren’t available, this local guitarist will do—provided I confiscate his machines and replace them with the neighbors’ percussion. *

This irredeemable, pusillanimous Afrikaner who, since 1994, only grinds white pepper and broods.

* Blood Sausage

South African poultry farming is in crisis—farms are emptying, and slaughterhouses are closing. Tens of thousands of jobs are at stake. The cause? Cheap imports of low-grade cuts (necks, wings, offal) from European farms. Not good enough for us, but plenty good for them—who won’t even get to choose between wing or thigh. So here we have overproduction, and there, destruction. Should we still be surprised that *they* want to come *here*? *

Unsustainable

The head chef of this upscale coastal restaurant is still buzzing: he received an award because all the fish he serves comes from a sustainable fishing supply chain. Note that what’s sustainable is, at best, the species—but certainly not the linefish on my plate, resting in its vegetable shroud. A good (or is it bad?) half of the diners are morbidly obese. What would *really* be sustainable is if they swapped their lunch for a fishing trip. But marketing’s harpoons are deadly. *

El Gecko

He’s a mural artist, an indefatigable graffiti creator of ephemeral works, and we’re lucky to have him in residence. He’s settled in the attic, as befits his status. The spotlights barely flick on before he takes the stage. With talcum-powdered suction cups, he clings to the shadow of the exterior light deflectors. When a butterfly flutters by, unaware it’s performing its last dance, our gecko waits for it to land—unwilling to leave his wall. He inches closer in short bursts until he’s within jaw’s reach, then waits some more, confident. When the other realizes and takes off—*snap*. Tonight’s lean pickings: he has to climb up and down for mosquitoes. The energy balance is negative until suddenly, a kind of beetle lands too close. *Crack!* Ugh. The prey’s got a tough hide. The gecko drops it, and it crashes to the ground, motionless. Trick or trauma? The crawler plays cat, but the other plays dead. The stage manager turns off the lights. One day, after feasting on saffron butterflies, the artist snubbed the mosquito menu. He shouldn’t forget why he’s housed here.
VO Voyajou Globetrotter ·
Hey Jeff, The Defender might be giving me a hard time, but I’m keeping it... for now. It’s a bit by default—nothing else on the market really grabs me. Maybe the next Defender?
MA Magryelle Regular ·
Really well written, as usual! You can really feel all the paradoxes of South Africa—the best and the worst—but it’s still a fascinating country with an extraordinary history. Is your Def getting bored? Ours is bursting with excitement for their South African trip in August.
MU Muriel18 Globetrotter ·
Hi Jean-Luc,

Another South African interlude—still a pleasure to read, but it leaves a bittersweet impression... Muriel
MA Max68 Globetrotter ·
Ah Ah! It's always a surprise "where's Voyagou?" ... now we know, he's sharpening his pen on the bus ...

Like Muriel, I find you a bit bittersweet ... shouldn't your loyal (well, sort of) companion take you exploring the diagonal? 😉

Following Julie, I had the feeling the sky had finally decided to let loose its buckets of water 😎

Thanks 🙂 🙂
VO Voyajou Globetrotter ·
which leaves a bittersweet impression....

Yes, just like this beautiful, wild, and harsh country. Have you read Troy Blacklaws (a predestined name, perhaps?)? http://www.babelio.com/livres/Blacklaws-A-beautiful-wild-and-harsh-world/494757

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