An 80-Day Tour of Southern Africa
FR

Translated into English.

VO Voyajou Globetrotter ·
scribbling on sheets that the wind carries away, carries away, carries away...

If I understand correctly, the tactic for approaching the scribbles of a Dolma is the same as the one used to approach a wild beast: you should lie in wait or approach from downwind. But I suspect we’ll swap the hunter’s strap (for what he desires) with the poet’s cravat.

And, just as a wild animal will ignore our expectations—well, I say *our*, but it’s mostly those of photographers—looking elsewhere, it’s possible your sheet might land on the wrong side. Do you write on both sides? Are your writings dangerous, or can one approach without risk?
VO Voyajou Globetrotter ·
Still up for feedback on the diagonal route?

yeesss sir 😛 🙂🙂🙂



This diagonal is first symbolic—a nod to the Diagonale des Fous, which takes place every year on Réunion and, by proxy, I know is tough to finish (I think it’ll resonate with you, since you run). It’s also because this string of national parks, plotted on a map, seems to form a diagonal across the southern part of the continent.

The idea was to spend time in these vast parks but also in the spaces connecting them, while sticking to our usual habit of changing location every day—like a migration, the kind animals make when they feel like traveling from Kgalagadi to Mana Pools.

Depending on the season (though this holds true year-round to some extent), we moved from semi-arid regions to lusher ones, from the dry riverbeds of Kgalagadi to the generosity of the Zambezi. During the rainy season, we journeyed from bushland getting less than 200mm of rain a year to forests soaking up four times that.

In the direction we took—southwest to northeast—we found two perks: - The parks get less crowded, especially this time of year (we had Mana Pools all to ourselves!). - The big animals missing in Kgalagadi gradually appear: hippos with the water, elephants with the mopane trees, rhinos when they feel like it.

We also crossed three countries, each with its own history and resources shaping different conservation policies and park management approaches.

Finally, it’s clear the parks aren’t closed off. We saw the largest gathering of antelopes—thousands of them—between Kgalagadi and Central Kalahari GR, and in Zimbabwe, elephants rule the roads.
MA Max68 Globetrotter ·
Hello Voyagou,

Back down from your cloud 😉 😛 🙂 You’ve made it back to California... and Breton drizzle.

Cette diagonale est d’abord symbolique

Perfect, I love symbols where imagination plays a big part. I loved being at the start of the Okavango Delta 🙂

As you so well explained, the diagonal also has meaning...

Nous avons rencontré le plus grand rassemblement d’antilopes, par milliers, entre le Kgalagadi et le Central Kalahari GR

did you remind them to be there again between April 17 and May 3, 2014?

Thanks... your message came just in time to make me dream again 🙂🙂🙂 Because Air Namibia isn’t helping with its inflated prices.

Any new destinations in your plans?

Cheers,

Max
https://apprentisvoyageurs.com
VO Voyajou Globetrotter ·
Back down from your cloud 😉 😛 🙂

Any new destinations in your plans?

Not really back down, and as for new destinations, even though a trip to the Appalachians is looming, I’m afraid I’ve become monomaniacal: I’ve got my sights set on a crazy Defender in Pretoria (if I show it to you, you’ll die!). Fancy joining to seal the deal?

and did you tell them to be back between April 17 and May 3, 2014?

Gosh! You didn’t warn me. No problem, I’ll be there a week early to round up the gang (what wouldn’t we do for friends😇🙂).
MA Max68 Globetrotter ·
I’ve got my sights on a crazy Defender in Pretoria (if I show it to you, you’ll die!); wanna swing by to seal the deal?

Now you’re playing the devil’s advocate...
https://apprentisvoyageurs.com
RJ Rjulie95 Globetrotter ·
Hey Jean-Luc,

If you close the deal, will you show us your setup? Even if you don’t, actually ;)

I’m really curious about how you manage to score deals from so far away. How do you verify the claims are legit?

Later,
"Je suis africain, non pas parce que je suis né en Afrique, mais parce que l'Afrique est née en moi." Kwame Nkrumah.

"J'ai appris que le courage n'est pas l'absence de peur, mais la capacité de la vaincre." Nelson Mandela

https://www.en-voyages.fr
VO Voyajou Globetrotter ·
Alright, fine, I’ll show it to the person who’ll close the deal on-site (careful! The suitcase full of cash is part of the deal! Just kidding, don’t worry). But I’m such a goof—I’ll see it before they do.🤪

I’m really curious about how you do business from so far away? How do you verify the claims?

"In life, you have to be vulnerable and open. You have to move forward, you have to put yourself out there." — Cédric Villani 🙂

I already bought a Defender in South Africa. After exchanging emails, you get a feel for the person you’re dealing with; people there are usually pretty straightforward. You secure a reservation by committing to buy if the vehicle matches the description (after ten emails and at least as many photos). Then you just have to go (and that’s where I’m counting on you—I’m stuck here🙁😉) and seal the deal. The one I’m eyeing is sold by a Land Rover dealership and is two years old, so the risks are limited.
RJ Rjulie95 Globetrotter ·
Well, I’m crossing my fingers hoping everything goes well! I wouldn’t suggest going to see it, since I don’t know anything about it—I wouldn’t be much help.

My departure is coming up 😎
"Je suis africain, non pas parce que je suis né en Afrique, mais parce que l'Afrique est née en moi." Kwame Nkrumah.

"J'ai appris que le courage n'est pas l'absence de peur, mais la capacité de la vaincre." Nelson Mandela

https://www.en-voyages.fr
PI Pierre77N Globetrotter ·
Hi Jean-Luc,

Your diagonal is pretty funny... I had some fun extending it a bit. 😉

VO Voyajou Globetrotter ·
Promise, Pierre, I'm heading to Malawi... if you come down to wrap up the Defender (Oh, but am I silly—it goes against your savanna religion, the Defender!😎)

I started the diagonal further south at Augrabies Falls NP: together, we’ll manage to pull off the legendary "Cape to Cairo."🙂

PI Pierre77N Globetrotter ·
if you're wrapping up the Defender

What? You don’t already have your flight ticket? 😉
VO Voyajou Globetrotter ·
What? You don’t already have your flight ticket? 😉

Flight AF 990 Paris-Johannesburg, May 10, 2013. 11:20 PM

I’ve been tipped off about a rare creature (young, muscular, sleek) lost in Pretoria. My mission is to bring it back to its natural habitat while there’s still time. I’ll be on the ground tomorrow morning, hoping a local tracker hasn’t beaten me to it. My local spotter hasn’t taken his eyes off the animal for a second. Are you ready for another 80-day adventure!🙁🙂?

.../...

Ding! You’ve got a new message.

Pretoria Land Rover Dealership Dear Sir, I regret to inform you that the Defender you were after has been sold today. I remain at your disposal. Jacob



In the end, when wisdom and events align, is that such a bad thing?
MA Max68 Globetrotter ·
Not to rub salt in the wound... but it had some real "character" 🏴‍☠️
https://apprentisvoyageurs.com
PI Pierre77N Globetrotter ·
🏴‍☠️They write surprisingly good French at the Pretoria dealership... Did you book with them?
VO Voyajou Globetrotter ·
Okay, I translated and tweaked the text (we’re on the world’s top French-speaking travel forum after all!) I hadn’t booked yet—Jaco had answered about ten follow-up questions by email, and the replies worked for me. (Thanks for your... encouraging feedback😎)

Let’s just say, every cloud has a silver lining—was it reasonable, though? (But I really wanted to treat myself for my birthday)
PI Pierre77N Globetrotter ·
we’re on the world’s top French-speaking forum after all

Really? 😮

Happy birthday! A Def, a girl’s whim???

There’ll be more...
LA Lacalo Globetrotter ·
Pfft! A whim, sure... but a girl’s whim... Whatever! Still, I admire your skill in managing to tell us it’s your birthday...😉 Big hugs, and I’d have gladly been the co-pilot for bringing the Defender back!
" Nous ne saurons jamais tout le bien qu'un simple sourire peut être capable de faire." Mère Teresa
VO Voyajou Globetrotter ·
Big hugs, and I would’ve gladly been the co-pilot for bringing the Defender back!

The co-pilot?

In that case, should I encourage Jaco in his search? Here’s what he wrote me (I’m not translating):

Afternoon Jean-Luc

Apologies for the delay, I was on training for a few days. The vehicle was sold by the client, I am currently looking for a vehicle for you.

A girl’s whim—would it have been a little bag, the most beautiful in the world, or a spa, so essential or...? ("impulse buy" would’ve better captured what I meant )
MA Max68 Globetrotter ·
Happy birthday Jean-Luc,

Looks like your gift will be late... but that’ll just make it even better.

I’ll be there a week early to round up the gang (what wouldn’t we do for friends?)

Especially since, if you don’t mind me asking, could you maybe have the zebras gather somewhere between the Boteti River and Nxai Pan (Makgadikgadi, for example)? 😉 🙂
https://apprentisvoyageurs.com
VO Voyajou Globetrotter ·
Alright, but how many days after the antelopes? I’m on foot now, you know! :( Here’s the story of a Swiss guy who crossed part of the Kalahari on foot with a San guide: Kalahari, Désert Rouge by Ph. Frey http://www.amazon.fr/Kalahari-d%C3%A9sert-rouge-Philippe-Frey/dp/222107405X
VO Voyajou Globetrotter ·
Hey for the Zambezi canoeing fans (there are a few in this thread): An experienced guy, half-swallowed by a hippo, makes it out alive. http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2013/may/04/i-was-swallowed-by-a-hippo
HE Herikles Globetrotter ·
Flight AF 990 Paris-Johannesburg, May 10, 2013. 11:20 PM

Tonight? And you still haven’t left?

You’re in for another 80 days!?🙁🙂

Yep. 😎

(But I would’ve loved to treat myself for my birthday)

Naughty. Happy birthday! 🙂
Les concours photos VF
LA Lacalo Globetrotter ·
A girl’s whim would’ve been a little bag, the most beautiful in the world,

Is *that* a girl’s whim? 😏 Guess I’m not a girl then… but I’m not dreaming of a Defender either! 😎
" Nous ne saurons jamais tout le bien qu'un simple sourire peut être capable de faire." Mère Teresa
RJ Rjulie95 Globetrotter ·
Happy birthday Jean Luc, next time for sure!

If you don’t mind me asking, how much is the car?
"Je suis africain, non pas parce que je suis né en Afrique, mais parce que l'Afrique est née en moi." Kwame Nkrumah.

"J'ai appris que le courage n'est pas l'absence de peur, mais la capacité de la vaincre." Nelson Mandela

https://www.en-voyages.fr
VO Voyajou Globetrotter ·
Hey Régis,

Thanks for your wishes.

The price for the same model in France... bare, without equipment, while the Southern African market is more expensive than ours. It was a real steal, which is why it sold so fast. I keep an eye on this market all the time, and I’d already bought the previous one at such a good price that I resold it at cost after a few months and tens of thousands of kilometers.
MU Muriel18 Globetrotter ·
Hi there!

No way, Jean-Luc, you're already leaving for real?????

A seasoned traveler, half-swallowed by a hippo

Now I get why our guide quickly moved away from the shore when we spotted a hippo 😮 (I know they’re dangerous, but we barely had time to see it!)

Muriel
Si tu diffères de moi, mon frère, loin de me léser, tu m'enrichis (Saint Exupéry)
PI Pierre77N Globetrotter ·
Here for the canoeing fans on the Zambezi (there are a few in this thread): An experienced guy, half-swallowed by a hippo, makes it out alive. http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2013/may/04/i-was-swallowed-by-a-hippo

That critter’s a real charmer... 🤪
SI Sitaelle Regular ·
Un Def, a girl's whim ???

And why not, huh?

Voyajou, instead, I’ll send you the daman de mandavu you also booked. Who do we thank?
VO Voyajou Globetrotter ·
After what felt like an eternity of a few months...

On the Boeing flying me back to Southern Africa, I could say at home—I feel that good here. Especially since they’ve recently claimed that the cradle of humanity is near Johannesburg (back in the day when Madame Taubira and I shared the same Papuan ancestor, though I hesitate to bring it up now—these days, she’s guarding the seals of office while I’m getting rained on tonight). Anyway, on this Boeing, my Indian neighbor is squeezed in like a Jumbo and… well, let’s just say he’s not smelling like roses.

But African nights have their own scents.

Night fades as we fly over southern Zambia, or so the screen (of my not-so-white night) tells me. In a dizzying spiral, I see snow covering Africa. No green, no red—just fluffy white. A whale-like snore snaps me back to reality: it hasn’t snowed; we’re above the clouds.

I tell myself that once we cross the Zambezi, at this time of year and hour, with a bit of luck, the clouds and snoring will be behind us. The snoring’s gone, but the clouds block my view of the land until we slice through them and fly over an endless sprawl: Johannesburg.

After a lightning-fast plane change, I’m speeding under the clouds at the wheel of a pumpkin-orange Polo, which, in 400 kilometers, will transform into a Defender-carriage(1)—if I make it before noon.

Tonight, as I collapse into an armchair under the corrugated iron awning of the house, the morning’s clouds unleash a downpour, heightening the pleasure of the first sip of brandy but failing to douse the fiery taste of spiced biltong. The storm is metallic, like a derailment, and lightning torments the tropical garden.

Martha, who serves breakfast, asks worriedly if I live in Marseille—she saw on TV that it’s a very dangerous city. Martha still lives in the township of Bloemfontein.

(1) I can already see some of you (2) laughing, knowing full well that a Defender’s comfort hasn’t improved much since the grand carriages of the 17th century. (2) For the uninitiated, corrugated iron roads are dirt, sand, or gravel tracks common in Australia and Southern Africa. They warp under the elements, giving the impression, when you drive on them, of rolling over corrugated iron.
AT Atila Globetrotter ·
(1) I can just picture them (2) laughing, knowing full well that, in fact, the comfort of a Defender hasn’t changed much since the grand carriages of the 17th century.

I mostly laughed at the thought of you behind the wheel of a Polo! 😉
AI AirOne Globetrotter ·
A new fairy tale begins. Cinderella in search of the prince charming’s carriage (there was a time when Cinderella was in love, but now, only the carriage interests her... a sign of the times?) And then—bam! We plunge into the most sordid trash: shepherdesses stuffed with biltong in brandy fumes under a corrugated iron roof... the Marseille mafia isn’t far off, Kalashnikovs spitting death in the garden amid thunder, lightning, and fire. No doubt about it, blood will flow!

In the end, will Max find his phone? You’ll find out in the next 2,896 episodes. It’s thrilling... I’m on the edge of my seat, as excited as a society lady diving into Régine Deforges’ latest novel... 🙂
Erwan La vie est belle ! La vie est belle ! Je me tue à vous le dire disait la fleur. Et elle meurt ( J.Prévert)
MU Muriel18 Globetrotter ·
Awesome, more new adventures 😏

Seriously, we never get bored on this forum!

Muriel
Si tu diffères de moi, mon frère, loin de me léser, tu m'enrichis (Saint Exupéry)
MA Max68 Globetrotter ·
So you're still a great negotiator since Southern Africa won again 😉

Gotta say, spicy biltong is a solid argument... otherwise, for the drink, I'd go with Windhoek Lager 😛

Have a great trip 🙂🙂🙂

Max
https://apprentisvoyageurs.com
RJ Rjulie95 Globetrotter ·
Yesss, Jean Luc is off again... a great travel journal full of adventures... can't wait to read the rest!

Have a great trip!
"Je suis africain, non pas parce que je suis né en Afrique, mais parce que l'Afrique est née en moi." Kwame Nkrumah.

"J'ai appris que le courage n'est pas l'absence de peur, mais la capacité de la vaincre." Nelson Mandela

https://www.en-voyages.fr
VO Voyajou Globetrotter ·
... otherwise for drinks I’d go with Windhoek Lager 😛

Got that in the fridge, Max (okay, fine, it’s draught, but I prefer it and it fits the vibe better)😉 Proof this afternoon in the mist at Golden Gate NP (one of the highlights is the light at sunset🙁) around 2,300 m.
PI Pierre77N Globetrotter ·
Are Polos like that now? 😛
VO Voyajou Globetrotter ·
Good grief, what a comment! I knew this whole "bergère" thing would raise eyebrows, even though I carefully wrote "slumped *in* the bergère" and not *on* it. What can I say—I looked for a period-appropriate toad, but there weren’t any.

When I shared the pumpkin-and-carriage story with my partner back in our beautiful country, she just said: "You’re not dealing with princesses!"

(For your palpitations, you should see a doctor)
VO Voyajou Globetrotter ·
Régis: a beautiful travel journal full of adventure Muriel: great, more new adventures

Small adventures this time: I’m only here for three weeks—angelic, I know—the second and third weeks I’ll be showing the area to two different people. Thanks for your kind words! 🙂

@Tila: here, it’s just like on TV—you’ve gotta laugh where they tell you to! 😉
VO Voyajou Globetrotter ·
Are Polos like that now? 😛

I arrived before noon and... the pumpkin turned into a carriage!
RJ Rjulie95 Globetrotter ·
Small adventures this time: I’m only here for three weeks,

Three weeks—I’d love to go back for three weeks myself... 🤪
"Je suis africain, non pas parce que je suis né en Afrique, mais parce que l'Afrique est née en moi." Kwame Nkrumah.

"J'ai appris que le courage n'est pas l'absence de peur, mais la capacité de la vaincre." Nelson Mandela

https://www.en-voyages.fr
MA Max68 Globetrotter ·
only 3 weeks... small fry 😉

No nitpicking, it’s a Windhoek 🙂

Otherwise, the landscape’s too green for me... I know, I know... we’re still wondering what I was doing in Vietnam" 😉 hee hee hee

Enjoy! You’re making a lot of our dreams come true 🙂🙂🙂
https://apprentisvoyageurs.com
RI Rivièrefox Globetrotter ·
Hi,

The proof this afternoon in the mist of Golden Gate NP

Looking at the photo, I’m thinking that usually the exhaust pipe (I forgot the name of that thing sticking out of the vehicle) runs along the bodywork and not on top like on your Polo! No?
Michelle
AT Atila Globetrotter ·
Snorkeling?
RI Rivièrefox Globetrotter ·
Yesss, Snorkel! 😎 Thanks! 😉
Michelle
AI AirOne Globetrotter ·
... otherwise for the drink, I’d go with Windhoek Lager 😛

I’ve got that in the fridge, Max (okay, fine, it’s draught, but I prefer it and it matches the car better)😉 Proof this afternoon in the mist of Golden Gate NP (one of its highlights is the light at sunset🙁) around 2,300m.

I’ve got some great photos of Golden Gate NP in the sunshine if you want? But without the beer... just with a bottle of "Fat Bastard" 😏
Erwan La vie est belle ! La vie est belle ! Je me tue à vous le dire disait la fleur. Et elle meurt ( J.Prévert)
HE Herikles Globetrotter ·
Took you long enough to crack! 🤪 😏😏 At least you’re letting us know this time. Have a great trip. 😎

(I’ve got plenty of Golden Gate photos, and they match your pumpkin polo 😉)
Les concours photos VF
VO Voyajou Globetrotter ·
Are you talking about that snorkel that helps feed the engine with less dusty air and keeps water out when crossing fords? I thought you meant the black Windhoek on the fender! Speaking of appendages, yesterday someone offered me oxtail with—you won’t believe it—roasted pumpkins, aka pumpkins, of course!
VO Voyajou Globetrotter ·
My pumpkin-Polo to match your Golden Gate Bridge? For Halloween? When I tell you there’s more than one thing in common between SA and the USA, starting with a Black president. Cities laid out in grids with streets wide enough to let a Land Rover do a U-turn (which is just the latest evolution of the wagon pulled by six pairs of oxen), a wild west, obesity on the verge of becoming endemic, material inequalities still largely tied to skin color, and so much more. There’s even a sheriff! 🤠
VO Voyajou Globetrotter ·
Did you know this region of the Free State is called the Eastern Highlands? And that for a melancholic Celt and a dark Defender, mist and clouds are friends? But for me, who was looking for an illustrator—here they are! 😉
VO Voyajou Globetrotter ·
Oh my breakfast!

Nicolene, a true-blue Afrikaner, is an artist—and it shows. She’s a fleeting masterpiece herself, from the tip of her dusty-rose hair to the color of her shoes, which match the pansy that’s about to top off my breakfast.

She’s reinvented the timeless full English breakfast with a few original presentations (I suspect this is her revenge on those pesky English folks). She describes their origins at length.

This morning, it looks like a carefully constructed multi-burger on a foundation of sausages, with binding ingredients (egg, cheese) holding together the crumblier bits (tomatoes, mushrooms, diced bacon). The whole thing is crowned with a vertical chive cross (a nod to her ancestors’ windmills, perhaps?) and decorated with a purple pansy (are pansies edible?).

From the first bite, you’re in Pisa; by the second, you’re at the Colosseum.

She keeps chatting away, savoring my appetite. It’s a slightly heavy start to the day.

The Temptation of Lesotho

I’m not entering Lesotho. Not yet. I’m circling it. Sometimes I brush against it, sometimes I drift away, following the small roads that embrace it in South Africa. Valleys stretch out like tongues, edged with plateaus like lips. Farther on, waterfalls glisten, and hills rise like mounds.

Then the real game begins—the curves grow sharper, I shiver, feeling the fire from deep within that lifted the mountains. A canyon opens up, and I hold back.

Tonight, I’m at Golden Gate, at the gates of the Kingdom of Heaven.

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